how to relax on our mind

Relaxing with Meditation

1. 1
   Do deep breathing exercises. Although the idea may seem cliche, deep breathing exercises work wonders on relaxing your mind. Practice these daily and in times of stress to help soothe your anxiety.
   
   
   
   • Close your mouth and take a deep breath in through your nose. Try to time this inhalation so that it lasts for four seconds. Hold your breath for seven seconds, and then exhale your breath for a count of eight seconds. Repeat this four times total.
   • If you have trouble slowing your breathing this far, start at a faster pace and slowly work your way up to a longer time.
   • Feel free to adjust the time each inhale and exhale lasts, but be sure that your exhale lasts for twice as long as your inhale. Pause between each breath.^[1]
2. 2
   Practice meditation. This is the process of clearing your mind by focusing on a specific thought, word, or object. To meditate, sit in a comfortable position and think about one specific thing. It may take upwards of ten minutes in order to completely clear your mind, but that is normal.
   
   
   
   • You can sit or lay down during meditation, but always keep your eyes closed to help you focus.
   • It is normal for restless thoughts to intrude on your meditation. Try to ignore them as best as possible, forcing your mind to focus on one specific thing.
   • Use guided imagery to help clear your mind. Imagine a place, real or fictitious, in which you feel at peace and stress-free. Focus on being in this place, including the details of what it looks like and how you feel in it.
   • Meditate for as long as you like, but resting for at least ten minutes once you have managed to clear your mind proves to be beneficial to overall stress-level and focus.
   • Playing calming music or sounds can help you to focus better for your meditation. Always do whatever is necessary for you to feel your most comfortable.^[2]
   • Meditation has proven to have health benefits in addition to causing mental relaxation, including lowering blood pressure, high cholesterol, and high blood sugar.^[3]
3. 3
   Try visualization. This is similar to guided imagery in meditation, in which you imagine a peaceful scene. Picture the scene in your head for as long as you would like, but focus all your thoughts and energy on visualizing this place in your mind.
   
   
   
4. 4
   Do progressive muscle relaxation. This is a process by which you tense and then relax all the muscles in your body. Relaxing your muscles after having them tensed alters your mental state, and helps your mind to be as equally soothed as your body.
   
   
   
   • Start by tensing the muscles in your face one at a time. These might include frowning, knitting your brows, scrunching your forehead, and setting your jaw. Then, allow each muscle to relax.
   • When you finish with your face, move down your body until you have done this with all your muscles.
   • Hold the tense muscles for 5-10 seconds each before releasing in order to get the most relaxation from the process.^[4]

Relaxing with Changes in Health

1. 1
   Practice yoga. Yoga is a type of stretching and low-impact exercise which helps to relax the muscles in your body. Because you must focus on each yoga pose, your mind is left no room to contemplate stressors and is forced into a state of peace.
   
   
   
   • It is best to start yoga by taking a class. Yoga classes are made to create a state of relaxation, even though there may be many people present. Look for local instructors or classes at nearby gyms.
   • Hatha yoga is the most basic style of yoga and is great for relaxation. Look for hatha yoga poses that you can try yourself at home.
   • Avoid doing yoga if you have physical problems such as a herniated disc, osteoporosis, or you are at risk for blood clots.^[5]
2. 2
   Drink lots of water. Water is important for keeping your body well hydrated and free of toxins, which helps your mind to focus better. To aid in other relaxation exercises, drink plenty of water.
   
   
   
3. 3
   Eat foods that promote relaxation. Certain foods help to lower hormones linked to causing anxiety, while simultaneously raising hormones which are responsible for creating a sense of happiness and peace.
   
   
   
   • Foods high in selenium aid in lowering anxiety and depression, and include nuts (especially brazil nuts), shiitake mushrooms, and tuna, cod, or salmon.
   • Eat foods that have a high magnesium content, such as spinach, pumpkin seeds, and halibut.
   • Look for foods with high tryptophan content, as this helps produce the chemical serotonin which increases happiness. Try dark chocolate, nuts, and red meat.
4. 4
   Exercise moderately. Exercise is responsible for releasing endorphins, which in turn create a feeling of happiness. Try doing a little exercise every day to help relax your mind after dealing with a stress-filled schedule.
   
   
   
   • Exercise in places that are quiet or allow time for you to be alone. If you workout at your gym, find an area or room that is mostly deserted, so that you aren’t distracted by thoughts of things around you.
   • Try to find mindless repetitive exercises to participate in. This might include swimming or running laps.
5. 5
   Participate in your favorite activities. If you love to cook, read, or play sports, do those things! Doing things you love will help you to clear your mind of anxiety, and will likely release more endorphins which cause happiness.
   
   
   
6. 6
   Drink warm liquids. Hot drinks help to relieve tension and reduce stress. Look for hot drinks that lack caffeine and alcohol, as these can stimulate anxiety and depression.
   
   
   
   • Green tea contains certain natural chemicals linked to reduced stress levels. Drink it hot or iced to get the peaceful benefits it provides.
   • Try drinking warm milk. This classic bed-time drink can help to soothe your troubled mind as it contains high levels of tryptophan, responsible for producing more serotonin in your brain. Warm milk in a saucepan with honey for a sweet relaxing treat.
   • If you choose to drink coffee to help you relax, find a decaffeinated version so as to not stimulate hyperactivity.
   • Avoid drinking anything with too much sugar, as this will stimulate your brain and make relaxing much more difficult.^[6]

Relaxing with Activities

1. 1
   Occupy yourself in a repetitive, mindless activity. Doing something that requires work but no focus can help your mind to relax.
   
   
   
   • Try doodling or drawing an abstract image. You are forced to focus on the act of drawing, and are therefore unable to think about stressors in your life.
   • Performing chores that use repetitive movements can induce relaxation. Think of raking leaves, sweeping the floor, or folding laundry.
   • Avoid things that require a lot of movement or that are very busy, as this can induce stress rather than reduce it.
2. 2
   Listen to calming music. Although you may love rocking out to hardcore rock or rap, find some slow, soothing tunes to help relax your mind.
   
   
   
   • Avoid music that has heavy instruments or loud vocals, as these will make it hard for you to relax while listening.
   • Instead of music, you can also listen to nature sounds and white noise which are developed to help people relax. Look for sounds of the ocean or forest, or find samples of white noise to try.
   • Binaural beats are a special type of music or sound that produce higher levels of alpha waves in your brain, which help you to relax. Find free versions of binaural beats online or through your favorite music streaming site.^[7]
3. 3
   Spend time with animals. Studies show that people who spend time with pets or touching animals have lowered blood pressure and are significantly less stressed than people who rarely come in contact with animals.
   
   
   
   • If you don’t have your own pet, consider borrowing your friend’s dog to take for a walk or cuddling up with your neighbors cat. A little animal time a day can go a long ways.
   • Look into animal assisted psychotherapy. This is a type of therapy that helps to reduce stress and anxiety by using animals. Often times horses are used, but dogs and cats are also popular options.^[8]
4. 4
   Try aromatherapy. This is when you use soothing scents to help you relax. Many popular aromatherapy smells include lavender, peppermint, and eucalyptus.
   
   
   
   • You can purchase aromatherapy oils to place directly on your skin. Dab a little around your temples and the inside of your wrists and elbows. These are some of the warmest places on your body, and will work to diffuse the scent faster.
   • Aromatherapy mists and home fragrances can be used to make your bedroom your own personal relaxation sanctuary. Find them in mists and candles to help your home smell peaceful.
5. 5
   Soak in a bath or pool. Warm water can help to release endorphins that reduce stress, so take a hot bubble bath for twenty minutes.
   
   
   

Avoiding Stressors

1. 1
   Stay away from social media outlets. A huge cause of stress is any social media, whether it be your phone or facebook account. Try to spend some time away from these things to help reduce your anxiety.
   
   
   
   • Turn off your phone or leave it in your car for a bit so that you don’t run the temptation of obsessively checking it every few minutes.
   • Leave your laptop closed and turn off your desktop so that you are not tempted to check your online media accounts.
   • If social media is a big enough stressor in your life, consider removing it entirely for a period. Deactivate your online social accounts for a few weeks or months until you feel that it will no longer cause a problem for you.
2. 2
   Don’t watch television. TV is full of bright colors, busy images, and constant noise which help to raise stress levels.
   
   
   
3. 3
   Spend time alone. Often the people around us cause us the most anxiety, so make it a point to spend some time with just yourself.
   
   
   
   • Take time off work to catch up on rest and alone time. Try taking a weekend retreat to a local town or nature reserve where you can have some time to think.
   • Cancel plans with friends if you overwhelm yourself with a too-packed schedule. It is important to have time with just yourself before sharing it with others.
   • Find time away from your family. It doesn’t matter how much you love them, everybody needs a bit of time separate from their family in order to keep a healthy mindset.
4. 4
   Avoid your known stressors. If you know that an upcoming test or meeting is what is causing your stress, try to spend time away from it to prevent additional anxiety.
   
   
   
   • Set firm boundaries for times in which you are willing to deal with these stressors, if they are work or school related. Promise yourself only to work on your homework until 8pm, after which you will spend time debriefing and letting go of stress.
   • If a certain person or activity is responsible for your anxiety, avoid them for a bit. Spend time thinking about why that thing in particular bothers you so much, and a solution to the problem.^[9]

How to Love Yourself First So Everything Else Falls Into Lines

The article's title comes from a comment once made by Lucille Ball, the world-famous American actress and comedian. She understood that before you could have a good relationship with anyone else, you must first have cultivated a good one with yourself. It's essential to have a solid foundation of knowing and understanding who you are, and what matters most to you. The hard part for most people is getting to know that person when you don't even know who you are yet. Yet, like a puzzle, it is something that takes time, patience and a lot of willingness to unravel the layers through trial and error. This article will walk you through some of the foundational steps that will help you to become best friends with the person who is truly you, so that you can appreciate how great and unique you are.

Edit Steps

1. 1
   Ask yourself: Who am I? This simple sounding question is actually very hard to answer. It is a question that goes directly to the root of your values, beliefs, doubts, sense of reality and even the external perceptions imposed upon you by others, whether or not true. When asking yourself this question, try the following:
   
   
   
   • Make a list of the traits, talents, skills and thoughts that you feel make up the person you are right now.
   • Ensure that you have a reasonable amount of both virtues and vices––everyone has at least eight good traits and eight less desirable ones. Don't beat yourself up––it's a whole bundle and you get to work on the parts you don't like. What matters is recognition at this point, acknowledging which traits you feel let you down in some way and finding good traits that you have probably never even thought about.
   • Take your time answering this question. It isn't likely to be something you'll answer over a cup of coffee. Start the ball rolling by giving yourself this question as a task for at least the next week, maybe even longer. Recall it when going about your daily duties. Then set a time to come back to writing down all the things you've decided make up who you are.
2. 2
   Ask a friend who knows you well to help you. If you feel confronted by having someone else point out your good and bad points, remember that if you do not agree with their evaluation you don’t have to accept it––it's their external perception of you and they can't really know you deep down. But it is recommended that you consider their analysis of you carefully and remember it as you taking a hard look at yourself. Some of the things that your friend says about you might strike a chord and might even help you to realize what needs changing or improving in your life.
   
   
   
3. 3
   Look up the meanings of words that you've designated as your weaknesses and strengths. You need to have a really deep understanding of the words. For instance, if you are told you are kind, what does being kind really mean? It encompasses generosity to others, compassion, thoughtfulness, giving of yourself and much more––which aspects of this trait resonate most with you?
   
   
   
4. 4
   Look at your list of weaknesses. It's important to acknowledge the things about yourself that aren't helping you to feel more fulfilled or successful in life. But don't be too hard on yourself––remember that this is your list and it's all going to be worked on, with clarity of perspective. For example, if you're bad tempered, this is clearly an area that is worth working on, to enhance your relationships with others and to stop using frustration and anger as an excuse for not getting the things you really want out of life. Focusing on what isn't working for you is a way of acknowledging that this behavior or attitude has outlived its usefulness (if it ever had any in the first place) and allows you to make a decision to turn weaknesses into strengths, or to focus more on your strengths so that you can leave the weaknesses alone altogether.
   
   
   
   • Be aware that in many cases people like us for our weaknesses because that is what makes us seem most human. Think about the high achievers in life who seem like super-human beings until something trips them up and reminds the rest of us mere mortals that they too, are only human. Faults in others reminds us that we're fallible humans and we can relate to it since we all have weaknesses. Perfection is really hard to relate to, especially when it is always at the forefront of a person's behavior and attitude.
5. 5
   Learn to be humble. By accepting that you don’t know everything, you become more likable and able to learn from others. Who likes a know it all? More to the point though, having to maintain a facade of always being the expert, all-knowing person in the room can set you up for fear of failure and a worry that you carry everyone else's burdens. Life is a shared journey during which we all have a role to play and no one person can do the job of every person. You can't be expert at everything and in trying to be so, you risk shutting off learning from the perspectives and ideas of other people that you can always keep building on to make yourself a better person and to understand the world more fully. By being humble, you let others know that their story and ideas matter as much as your own.
   
   
   
6. 6
   Keep it real. Honesty is really a great trait to have; it lets other people know that you can be relied on and that your word is your bond. Honesty isn't about being blunt or rude though––it's about telling things candidly with a view to respecting other people's intelligence, feelings and needs too. Moreover, honesty is about the everyday things in life, like not taking stationery home from work without permission or not taking the tomatoes from the farmer's stand without leaving change. Honesty is a way of letting you continue to feel good about yourself inside, knowing that even if other people haven't done the right thing, you have and will continue to do as an example of the most fulfilling way to live. Honest people can live with themselves, a fact which makes it so much easier to love yourself.
   
   
   
7. 7
   Stop telling yourself negative stuff. Things such as "I am so fat" or "I am so stupid", do not help you, period. They are bad stories that you choose to tell yourself and they do not let you off scot free from having to continue to work on yourself, which is often a compelling reason for maintaining a negative view of yourself. Instead, choose to tell yourself a different, more self-respectful story whenever the negative voice raises its noise level. Tell yourself helpful things, such as "I need to work on my schoolwork harder", "I will get that promotion if I spend more time reviewing my management skills" or "I may be short but I am the fastest and most agile person on this field".
   
   
   
8. 8
   Speak to yourself as if you were your friend. Do you speak to yourself in a way that you would never dare speak to a friend? If so, this is extremely telling about how much you're undervaluing yourself while giving everyone else but yourself the benefit of the doubt. Instead of berating yourself as an angry parent might berate a child all the time (and perhaps this is precisely how your mind has taken to viewing yourself), start to talk to yourself as you would do to a friend you care about. Use kind words toward yourself, such as "You look good today. Your hair looks great." and "I have made great progress." These words will help you, encourage you and allow you to treat and see yourself in a valued and caring way.
   
   
   
9. 9
   . Along with negative words, sometimes it is easy to put yourself down so much that you won't allow yourself to enjoy life. This will never do. Life is short and it behooves each human being to make the most of each day given. Give yourself the opportunity to let down your hair, to have fun and to get away from a life of "all chores, no play" by scheduling in self-time that won't be interrupted by chores, other people or stinking thinking. Some of the things you might tell yourself include: "I will sit at the park today and read a book", "I will take a bubble bath", "I will eat something I love" or "I will pamper myself today". Remember, you deserve it.
   
   
   
10. 10
    Make peace with yourself. If you dropped the ball and let someone down, try to not do that in the future; use the experience as a lesson to build on, a lesson that will now let you become the better person you're always striving to be. Instead of telling yourself that you're always a bad person, remind yourself that you would have done better if you knew how and that the experience in itself has taught you that "how" for future reference. Give yourself a break and make peace with that part of you that can sometimes be too rough on yourself.
    
    
    
11. 11
    Keep learning and allowing yourself to change. Growing throughout life is something every person needs to do. Anais Nin once made the comment that "life is a process of becoming, a combination of states we have to go through. Where people fail is that they wish to elect a state and remain in it. That is a kind of death." In other words, don't die before your time––in accepting that you change over time and renew yourself, you allow yourself to grow freely into the person you are fully meant to be at that point in time. Loving yourself is a journey, not an end.
    
    
    

How to Make a Chalkboard Flower Pot

1.Create a space for spray painting the flower pot. Cover surfaces with newspaper or a drop cloth to prevent staining. In addition, make sure the area is well ventilated (or go outdoors).

Painting the Pot

1. 1
   Place the pot (without the plant inside it) on the covered surface. Option: Shake the can as instructed, then spray to coat the pot evenly with chalkboard spray paint.
   
   
   
2. 2
   Smoothen the pot using a 80 grit sandpaper.
   
   
   
3. 3
   Clean it using a wet rag so the dust will be removed.
   
   
   
4. 4
   Start Spraying the pot
   
   
   
   • If you don't have a Chalk spray paint, you can purchase chalk paint readily available in hardwares.
     
     
     
5. 5
   Allow the first coat of paint to dry. This can take up to 24 hours depending on humidity levels.
   
   
   
   • Consider adding a second coat. You will want this paint to be especially durable as your recipient will be writing on it (and erasing) often.
     
     
     
6. 6
   Add flourishes to the pot if desired. If you're going to paint a special message or add a painted border along the top of the pot, do this now.
   
   
   
   • Messages could include "Best Sister", "Thanks Teacher" or "Love You", etc.

Adding the Plant or Flower

1. 1
   Carefully drop the flower or plant into the fully dried decorated pot.
   
   
   
   • Make sure all of the paint has completely dried and completely finished before adding the plant. Painted leaves make it hard for the plant to photosynthesize!
2. 2
   Add a ribbon and/or card holder to the plant. Finish off the gift with a decorative ribbon or some way to make it look festive. It's now ready to give to your lucky recipient.
   
   
   
3. 3
   Write a special message on the chalkboard paint. For example, write something like “thank you for helping me to grow” if you're giving to a teacher, or "thanks for all your help with the bake sale" for a volunteer.
   
   
   
4. 4
   Finished.
   
   
   
   1

How to Make a Chalkboard Flower Pot

1.Create a space for spray painting the flower pot. Cover surfaces with newspaper or a drop cloth to prevent staining. In addition, make sure the area is well ventilated (or go outdoors).

Painting the Pot

1. 1
   Place the pot (without the plant inside it) on the covered surface. Option: Shake the can as instructed, then spray to coat the pot evenly with chalkboard spray paint.
   
   
   
2. 2
   Smoothen the pot using a 80 grit sandpaper.
   
   
   
3. 3
   Clean it using a wet rag so the dust will be removed.
   
   
   
4. 4
   Start Spraying the pot
   
   
   
   • If you don't have a Chalk spray paint, you can purchase chalk paint readily available in hardwares.
     
     
     
5. 5
   Allow the first coat of paint to dry. This can take up to 24 hours depending on humidity levels.
   
   
   
   • Consider adding a second coat. You will want this paint to be especially durable as your recipient will be writing on it (and erasing) often.
     
     
     
6. 6
   Add flourishes to the pot if desired. If you're going to paint a special message or add a painted border along the top of the pot, do this now.
   
   
   
   • Messages could include "Best Sister", "Thanks Teacher" or "Love You", etc.

Adding the Plant or Flower

1. 1
   Carefully drop the flower or plant into the fully dried decorated pot.
   
   
   
   • Make sure all of the paint has completely dried and completely finished before adding the plant. Painted leaves make it hard for the plant to photosynthesize!
2. 2
   Add a ribbon and/or card holder to the plant. Finish off the gift with a decorative ribbon or some way to make it look festive. It's now ready to give to your lucky recipient.
   
   
   
3. 3
   Write a special message on the chalkboard paint. For example, write something like “thank you for helping me to grow” if you're giving to a teacher, or "thanks for all your help with the bake sale" for a volunteer.
   
   
   
4. 4
   Finished.
   
   
   
   1

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